Depression…or whatever it is.

  • I have been in a funk lately. I dont know if it is depression or one of my other troubles. I dont care about anything. I feel numb. It hasn’t affected my writing or note taking. My Muse sendd me a steady supply. I am writing ideas on my note app and on my folded note papers and even straight into my sketch/note books. Im well into note book 22 now. I probably need to go see somebody. Maybe I need to “get” on something. There is too much “noise” in my life. Ask any introvert about noise. For us, it’s not too good. I need a quiet place. I wonder if the medicine of quiet time might help.
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Depression…or whatever it is.

  • I have been in a funk lately. I dont know if it is depression or one of my other troubles. I dont care about anything. I feel numb. It hasn’t affected my writing or note taking. My Muse sendd me a steady supply. I am writing ideas on my note app and on my folded note papers and even straight into my sketch/note books. Im well into note book 22 now. I probably need to go see somebody. Maybe I need to “get” on something. There is too much “noise” in my life. Ask any introvert about noise. For us, it’s not too good. I need a quiet place. I wonder if the medicine of quiet time might help.

My New Space

I have been away for a while now. I left a bad situation and I have been laying low. I have read many posts and commented on them, but I haven’t written any of my own. I have a new desk and supplies to go with it. I didn’t buy anything new. I went to thrift stores and craigslist to get everything. It took months piecing it together. I wanted a desk like the one I used to own ,but couldn’t find one so I bought a roll top desk. I am very happy with it and I don’t think I will ever be happy without one. They are amazing and filled with many hiding places. This is one of the largest I have ever seen. It is 54 inches wide. I replaced the locks and keys on it. The people I got it from bought a bigger storage desk unit with shelves on it and needed to get this one out of the way. I have my old typewriter hanging out on top. I found some vintage items to place around on it. Just for fun. I did splurge on one item. I found a LED light bar for my work light. It is awesome and doesn’t get in the way. It has 5 different light settings and has a USB port built into the side. I took out the under side keyboard slide and built a drawer to replace it. I have even more room. I hate those keyboard slide trays.

Note page 200

I reached page 200 of saved notes for stories and fragments of dialogue, etc. These pages come from my Notepad app. Whenever I have an idea or hear something funny, I write it down. I have to be quick or I will forget it. I still do handwritten notes at work. Those are the ones I cut up and paste in my books. The note app is a life saver. I grab the phone and start typing. When I am happy with the length of the page I text it to my google account and store it.

Confessions of an Introvert, part one…maybe.

We don’t confess.
Part two will be shorter.
Just kidding.
I have written alot about Introverts in my previous posts, but their is always something to be said about our kind. Even if it has been said one hundred times. I just got a chill. I knew something was different anout me, but I couldn’t figure it out. A good friend, studying psychology, talked with me and told me she thought I was an Introvert (always capitilized).
Yes, I can work with people and do customer service. Why? I need a paycheck. When I am off work, no one can find me , because I like being by myself. Im more than a little antisocial. I am not mean though. It is just the way I am. It is the classic Introvert symptom of a crowd draiming my batteries. I need the quiet time to recharge. I have people that I love and enjoy being with. A small group. Look at my photo. It is the picture of a door. The door is closed. I function with the crowd … from a distance. From the fringe, the edge. I won’t move up in my job, because I get to be alone in a truck, sitting in a corner, observing. I don’t have the radio on. I am resting my mind and guess who shows up 75% of the time. My Muse. I practically came up with the core of my ideas, sitting in that corner. It amazes me what ideas that some peace and quiet will bring forth. My greatest writing idea came from that spot.

I am from the South and the Bible belt. I have a hard time attending services due to being an Introvert. The crowds and all the togetherness affect me deeply. I didn’t check my usage of “affect/effect” .  I can do the crowd scene but it makes me queasy on the inside. I can go to the theater. You have to be quiet and it is dark.

My Muse was drunk when she thought of that.

I am beginning to add “notes and stuff” to my 19th sketch/notebook. I was browsing through book 8 to 12 today and I came to the conclusion that my beautiful Muse was drinking heavily when she sent some of these ideas to my thoughts. I write my notes dowm so i wont forget them and I usually forget them quickly so its a new revelation when i read them agsin for the first time. The combination of introversion and a superior Muse sends me a cascade of wonderful things. I must admit it was good stuff but I prefer her to be sober. She might send my ideas to someone else.

999 extroverts

You have 1000 people in a meeting hall. Pick out the single Introvert. The Introvert will probably be leaning against the wall watching the extro’s getting drunk on each others company. People are batteries for extro’s. Introverts have built in batteries. We can work alone without crying the blues of loneliness. The Intro will have a tag with no name written on it. We don”t need to have our name known. It’s not important. The best way to find the Intro? Watch the door. We will be the first out of it, of course, without telling anyone. I don’t know how you got one of us at the meeting/party to begin with.

Shopping at the glossary store

See that photo of fruits and veggies? They are all my notes and scraps of dialogue and offering from my Muse. Writing them all down was like shopping the grocery store for my food. Words are my food. I have to prepare them by washing and cleaning them and chopping them up. I will add them to the pot and simmer slowly and put in a little seasoning here and there. When it tastes just right, I will have my book. I just have to pick up a knife and get started. That’s the hard part.